If It Wasn’t For my Parents…

Posted Thursday, May 28th, 2009. Filed Under Voices of youth

What is the role of a parent? At what point do we need to stop blaming our parents for things in our life and sit back and take responsibility … EVEN IT THE PARENT OR PARENTS WERE NOT “GOOD” ACCORDING TO YOU.  

When you say, “I hate you, you are the worst mother/father in the world and I wish you never existed”, do you really mean this? 

As a mother and listening to mother with children older than mine, I hear some crazy stories and I think what is this really about.  When my children say something to the effect, “I hate you…” I look at them and while I am not happy about this, I really try and not take it personally for I know deep down this is not what they mean. My children know that I love and accept them unconditionally.  I feel that my responsibility as a parent is to guide my children and lead by example.  I am human and there are times that I f**k up. I have called my son to say “I am sorry” about something specific.

As my children get older and the issues become more “serious” I know that I can only guide my child and at some point I need to stand back and let them take their path of learning, growing and awareness.  It is not the responsbility of the parent to “fix” everything for how will you learn.  As a parent we need to make sure that we do not enable our children to the point of being “disabled”; inability to make choices and decisions and then see the consequences — favourable or not.  This is your journey and if you are having a challenging time with your parent/parents perhaps the real issue is your own happiness.

No one can make you FEEL wothy, loved, happy, at peace. Only you can choose to do this. If this is difficult for you then please find someone who can guide and work with you through this time – ask someone your trust and love. I have provided many great books on loving and honouring yourself – Louise L. Hay — all of her books are amazing.

Start to feel one with yourself and recognize your brilliance – You just need to “remember” and that is what the journey of awareness does – it reminds you!  Be open to messages – they come in the most amazing ways – signs, songs/lyrics, a compliment, etc.

Look in the mirror and say “I love you, you are worthy”.

All my best,

Sandra

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