It Feels Good When You Can Collaborate…

Posted Thursday, November 19th, 2009. Filed Under Voices of wisdom

MY SON ASKED ME TO STEP IN, CALL THE MOTHER OF A BOY HE WAS HAVING ISSUES WITH… To be honest I really do not like to step in with my children as I am learning that we need to stop enabling and begin empowering our children even from a young age. That does not mean that you stop guiding, it just means that our children will have their own experiences and they will learn from them and gather their own awarenesses.

WHAT WAS I GOING TO SAY TO THIS WOMAN? When I did call I really sat down to think about how I was going to approach this without sounding like the typical interferring mother. What I love about this woman is that by profession she is a socail worker in the school board system and she gets it. I told her the situation as I knew it, I asked her what suggestions she had in handling this, I told her it may be because of my own son’s behaviour – I do not know. We left if that she will talk to her son and get back to me.

THE NEXT DAY… I get a call first thing in the morning and she tells me that she did speak to her son. We establish that the boys do have their own rules – whether they made sense to us or not – and that he did not realize that my son felt this way – excluded.

What I really loved about her is that she presented it by reversing the roles- how will you feel if… and the son admitted he will feel sad. It is such a pleasure to work with another human being in this fashion. There were lessons on both sides for I told my son that if he chooses to play than he must agree to the rules that everyone agrees to and second if he does have an issue than he needs to speak his truth and let others know.

This experience left me with such a great feeling that we are on the better path of humanity. We need to learn to collaborate and stop blaming and pointing fingers and fighting to be RIGHT. When we do the results are incredible.

All my love,

Sandra




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