Turning 50 … whole new lease on life

Posted Friday, July 21st, 2017. Filed Under Voices of wisdom

This year I turned 50. In fact my 50th birthday celebration coincided with Canada celebrating its 150th celebration. I am born on July 1st, 1967. My children joke with me that I am born 100 years after Canada’s independence.

I was out of the country during the celebration but I heard it was fantastic.

For me turning 50 and being away I was able to step back and take a look at my life. I didn’t just do a year in review, I really took time to look at my last 50 years. Of course many of those years (birth and high school) I didn’t always make my own choices however in my 20s, 30s and 40s I certainly did.

I have taken a look at my thought patterns and beliefs and deciphered where they come from: are these imposed from my family or institutions? Do I really align with certain beliefs and thoughts? Is this who I am? Is this who I want to be?

My son posted a quote on his instagram that said, “I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them”. On a good note, he said he loves me. From this racent travels I really was able to be immersed in my family and observe the thoughts and actions that have influenced my life. Over the course of the trip I became quiet. I really just became the observer. It was interesting. At the end of this trip I really made a decision of who I am: how I want to live my life, the beliefs I hold to be true, how I want to behave and so forth.

I love my family and their intentions are good. Saying that there are things (thoughts and behaviours) that I once held to be true but no longer. Turning 50 for me meant I will be in my full power of who I am, speak 100% my truth when I feel necessary and other times remain quiet (no need to talk… rather just be), and not be concerned with any form of pleasing. I have been practising this for a while however there are moments in the last little bit where I ‘forgot’ this and reverted back to some of my old ways. Not anymore.

The result has been upon my return from my trip I have stayed true to this. In the last week I have firmly brought up when things are not acceptable to me, shared my feelings on certain matters that are true to my core and reminding myself daily that I am in full control of my outcome. I have also let expectations go. It may sound awful but having no expectations means I do not get disappointed. It is also a way to let go of “my need to control”.

Turning 50 for the most part has been good. The more challenging part is the next stage of my life, menopause. I am not sure I am ready for that! I am not there yet. As I look at myself in the mirror I see a vibrant, young at heart, fun loving person. I am committed and passionate about my work, I am spending time with the people I care about, and most important I am practicing self-love. I know exactly how I want to live the next 50 years of my life.

On that note I want to wish everyone a wonderful weekend.

All my love,

Sandra

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